RELUCTANT


through the sheets of colored glass
a reluctant warrior peers
praying that he not have to draw his sword
praying he does not have to prove himself
or disprove another

not wanting to test the boundaries
yet he knows
he hangs his head
he knows he must

and with a great have he pushes the panes of glass over
and he stands visible to all
and finally
he lets the hunger rage

for the first time in his life
and as young king
he lets the hunger rage
and the eyes show all
what the King intends

there will be battle
swift furious
and yes bloody
the just...and unjust alike shall be mowed down

for there can only be one will
and he smears his war paint to hide a single tear
and with a roar he launches from his throne
walks steadily bare footed thru the broken shards
and he does not flinch

today he rises
today he stands
and regardless of want
today he is there's
he is their king

and by God and Goddess
he refuses to let them down
down to his last breath
he will move foreward

BY: MJMansfield
7-9-98
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RustyKnight 
I wear a suit of armor just for you..
your knight in rusty shackles....
broken and battered and loving....
Shiny and dinged and bloody
smiling and wincing with joy at your tortures
taken each blow with great exhuberance...willing another...
Born to serve..Bred to die...
Commanded to live...under this cruel guise...
Wanting only your smiles...no matter what the cost
It is why I survive....torture so sweet
To be here with you...taking every blow
Watching your release...makes it all worth while
For I’m not here for long
Born to serve..Bred to die
Sweet Shackles of rust...bound to this earth
Shiny armor of a heart that could not trust
A man stripped naked......beaten so beautifully
Naked shining..a new heart of steel
A Heart that will not rust
That can not fail
Born to serve...Bred to be eternal
Flames that cannot turn the metal
Rage thru and across him
The Rusty Knight takes all your torture and feeds the fire
Takes every blow...Deep in his heart they turn to rain
Cool summers rain....washing him
Takes every torture...knowing it’s not him
It’s you that will never be the same
Taking them in...no pain
Knowing.........
Whincing ..... quickly smiling
Born to serve......Bred to Love
Smiling.... naked no armor needed
Only Love offered back

By:MJMansfield 5/30/98
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 CrystalMe

with only the sound of my heart and its vibrant band of colors
screaming and singing
glimmering in the light
a den of noise yet each note is heard and none missed
totally overwhelmed yet so soothing
not a minute wasted  yet no action being taken
the beautiful act
of being inside of something that is inside of you
the gem rotates slowly
the force around it spins as well
drawing down the energy to be cleansed 
drawing away from the gem
as it draws quickly
a new storm arises
and with it
clean energy spirals up around the gem
till the entire cavity of BEing is filled
with beautiful blue light
spinning and dancing
it fills...drives
pushing forward
with gentle nudges 
it throws the BEing forward as if catapulted
flying thru the levels of it’s own being
trancending the last one so quickly
it barely knows it was
yet it always knows it is
growing....spreading
wildly beaming through out the BEing
escaping him..and only growing
with each bit given up it is replaced ten fold
a glorious loss of that which cannot be lost
gifts that have to be given away
treasures that cannot be held
only growing in worth as they are passed along
flaming feathery wisps of light
rainbows hidden inside the blue flame
not a sound left out in the complete silence
every lack of note is a scream of love
every void is a crowded inn
asking for more to enter to accept the gifts
every word not spoken
is a speach of love
a concert of forgiving
and a testamonial of pure caring
in this strange silince I beg you dance with me
let it fill your ears and eyes
your heart and soul
and come scream yell cry and smile
come scream in the silence with me
come sing..the beautiful nothing that is all
please..please
please come be.....
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 GNOME
A small stout gray green gnome slowly rises from the grass
Wearing a kingly robe that makes him look like a jester
his eyes flash, full of fire of life
showing hate love power and gentleness
he smiles a long slow smile that angels would wish to have
he slowly reaches out his short well batterred arms
Stretching grandly his body crackles in resistance
But his will is stronger and he indeed makes his stand
Looking into the sky
to a mother and father that it seems abondoned him long ago 
closing the glistening green eyes...
the smile changes, it is all consuming
arching his back slightly he crackles again
but this time it is energy rolling off of him
Thru him great waves of electricity burst forth......
From every hair small blue flames rage
From his outstretched submissive hands comes a barrage
An attack of pure love, thousands of years old
In waves healing energy rolls off of him spreading growing
Rippling out until great waves rush away from him
The ancient gnome sits remembering his Lord and Lady
Caring not if they remember him for simply he is
And in his being he decides he will heal his world
Damn the gods, He will be his own god
And love will flow again
he decides 
simply 
it will start here

By: MJMansfield

6/28/98
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FEWDal CRASH 


Silver crested beast
rising slowly from its slumber in the sky
Beast of gold  and purple.......
rising thru the suns glow
ancient and fresh.....old spirit ..
with the glow of youth Power and ....tenderness....
pure will.....and solid..steel
The Fiery Beast neither Phoenix nor dragon....
Rising a new creation  in his own image.....
the image of his heart..power and love....
The fiery hand smashes thru the dawn....
like the steel workers hammer gone beserk....
sparks of rage..and venom..
cascading from the bows of heaven

The blood dripping from his body....
a signal to rage harder not retreat.........
a warrior complete....
fire from his eyes..
and pure hate on his breath....sweet sweet
as a summers dream gone horribly wrong...
the blackness oozes from him..
covering each victim...
not only defeated but consumed
he rambles on...
fiery tracks,scarring the heavens...
and scorching  hell itself


there is no stopping one....
complete in power...
dark in love...and light in hate
the beast laughs...stay is wonderful..
let them think they have won...
the stay..hold at bay.....
thinking love...love when I am love..
and I go thru their very souls dragging them
into the bowels of my hate with me....
no earth nor moon nor god stops me...
The furious hands beating a hollow drum....
pulling attention from the tender insidious tendrils...
sneaking thru their very being....
a Darkness so perfect....it is beauty and love........
Violent twisting beauty.....
dancing in light..........
and shining glorious beacons of a blue fire....
glowing drawing from all directions....
The Glorious Flames.......
*he laughs aloud*...like the gods own erection......
beautiful..no denying...and
yet profane....and disgusting
pulling all to his center...
surrounding them as they move forward....
into his light....
where theirs is but a flicker......
no darkness to run........swarmed by perfect love....Hate *S*
Dancing..profanely joyious........
gathering stroking fondling....pleasing...destroying
cuddling....breathng......
devouring each sweet perfect soul...
Feast of perfection..
gathering.......creating........destroying...
Looking up into his brothers eyes....yes love 
dear love..and sweet sister too...
no more to show your way...
you will face me alone *smilng*
cursing you to be burden with me......
I am to be borne from heaven again...
and you will hold me..
and you will be unable to raise a hand
For I love you...*smiling*..I Love you
cradling each soul tenderly in his gut
oh I loved them all....
and I harmed no one...
no *he smiles* I played by your rules....
I loved....loved them all
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REBORN 

a slow walking fast talking demon from hell
A Gentle smile and eyes of fire
He draws up that gut burning desire
Cinnamon and Thyme
Rising from the ground
His words like cream
Slow smooth loving sounds
Never telling more than enough
Or speaking out of turn
Gentle gentle lamb
The true son of man
A winged warrior on a self imposed banishment 
An unholy sabbatical 
A very happy child in this unholy land
He pulls the ski mask over his face
And he slips gently into the human race
An imposter on the greatest scale
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CRYSTAL BLADE 

I watch the crystal blade slice thru my brain
And the stars begin to shine.....
A sweet revenge a murderers binge
A sentence for no crime
A terror dream
A strange strange scene
Running thru my mind
A million voices screaming for me
Not a single one is mine
Twisting into the night dark and brilliant
Shining bright
Hands upon me
There is no fight
I submit to the knife
Crystal dreams
The psycho king 
Here to claim his worlds
The sunlights martyr
A child of night
Not a will of hate
But born to fight
Silent screams..of joy, my pain
Loving  all insane
Wrapped in the truth so absurd
Some would say a game
Wild and free
Sliced to bits
And every piece a new reality
Truth is sickness
Spreading thru my veins
Into the the darkness spreads
Bright and honest 
A terror of truth
Going where the path it lead...spinning quietly
Sword in  deep...twisting.....slaying
Saving me
Eyes closed the stars revealed
The voices scream
They scream...silently...
They scream peace
Violently...peace
Filling me
Every piece of  me.......
By:MJMansfield
2-1-98.

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DEAD SEA


When you discover all that you are
And it no longer exists
When you dive deep inside
On some Mystical quest
And all that you find
Is an old empty chest

A sign that something used to matter
No real hope for tomorrow
No real treasure in you
Just signs of what used to be
No real hope 
No where to go
Just a hollow shell of yesterday
No grand quest
Or star to be chased
Under all the shimmering light
Is just another empty night
An long empty sea
Reflecting back only lights of others
Long dead and....and
Simply living thru the brilliance of others

By: MJMansfield
10/8/98
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EAGLE 2


He is like star dust falling from heaven
Choking out the darkness
Spreading with the wind
For he is pure thought
No body to hold him back
He is one...with his universe
The dust gathers
Forms into the Etheric Eagle
Soars high and fast
Circling his mother earth
Basking in her and his fathers love
Diving down into his land
He glides out of the mist looming larger than the forest itself
Each beat of his heart brings his mighty wings down
Wings of flaming metal
Violet and gold
Gentle motions with violent beauty
Each slow stroke forms storms
Blowing down and away from him
Scouring the Earth and any who fall below him
Covering them with his love
A beast to big too be real
Yet to beautiful to be denied
Slowly crawling thru the sky
He shouldn't be at all
But yet here he is
Burning thru the night
Scorching his existence upon the earth
All the while knowing he should be elsewhere
Yet he continues
Smiling and flying
Weary yet strong
Mighty yet weak
For he loves...and it is good
Yet confusing for him
Even as he is of pure love
It yet confuses him
He knows he does not belong
But he stays to love as long as he can
Satisfied to do all he can while he may
After slowly circling his love for years
He slowly pulls away into he heavens
Hoping his next brother watches the land as good as he
With the same love
In a flash he is but a memory to the stars

By: MJMansfield

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I am blessed

So many nights
I’ve spent
Wasting them on praying to a god that just never was
So many hours
Spent
Praying to Gods that just don’t care about me
So many days wasted
Justifying to myself
Who or what I was
What I was supposed to be
Added to those days
Are many more 
Spent worrying over what I was doing wrong
Amazingly the last few days
I’ve been happy
Pondering over all the things I’ve done right
Marveling, that in a world where I now put Love first
The ending is just the beginning
And my mistakes
Are just a guide to my future triumphs
That now when my gods see me
They know I am one of theirs
Knowing that if others judge me wrong 
It is much more their loss, than mine
And though I have my doubts
I know I have the ability to answer the questions
That if I pay attention an answer will be given
And in all of this
If it seems I am chanting on my abilities
Then you missed the whole point
I am humbly the follower of love
And yes I am proud
Proud that I can love you
Honestly and simply as you
I am blessed
That I am allowed to see you as you are
And in My Lord and Lady’s will
Can love you as you
May Peace go with you down all of your paths

Simply, and forever, FireEagle/WaterDragon
MJMansfield
10/9/98
(FireEagle/WaterDragon)

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FireCape

The Warrior walks in his Royal red battle garb spottless...
Reaching his arm out in a grand sweep....
Pushing the lush cape out of the way....
He reveals a gleaming massive golden sword
Reaches slowly down with his other hand
And with only a flick of his wrist the sword flies out 

***SHHuunnnkkkkk****

Sinking soundly into the wood at the middle of the pit
It quivers and hums musically....
The Boys eyes twinkle....
He seems to glow with merriment...
Hair blowing back.....
He Laughs...
Throws his cape high in the air

****BBBOOOOMMMMMM****

A red mist pours up from where he was
Stinging everyones skin delightfully, like a warm massage
Then quickly rushing up
To catch the fluttering cape....
The cape rolls twice upon itself
As if it is ready to come crashing down
Then suddenly..it spreads wide
And burst into flames
The wind catches it and it lifts higher
As if it’s taken a life of it’s own
Soaring higher the flames..engulf it
The flames die out
Leaving a dark shadow spiraling back down...gently
As if...as..if ...a bird....???...a raven........no
As the stars hit the metallic feathers 
It becomes, clearly, a Giant eagle
Landing gently upon the massive hilt of the sword
Perched upon it..as if a grand ornament
Slowly spreading it’s wings
The Eagles eyes finds the eyes of those around the pit
And speaks to them
It is all connection and love
Slowly spiderwebs of golden light run across his body and wings
Millions of tiny points.....
This is us....as seen by My Lord and Lady
The way we are and must be
The webs grow thicker and faster
Until they cover him completely
No longer a web but a solid plating....all....no gaps
A complete family of love
From the Fire in my Heart, My Lord and Lady’s love
Slowly he twists and melts into the sword
Both twisting downward glowing.....into the wood

.....*****POOFFFF*****.....

The fire jumps in the pit...taking on life and pupose
To draw the family together to show the way to love
A beacon for all souls
The ground rumbles a bit
And raises slightly...bubbles....slowly outward
5 paces from the pond..
It erupts..in flames and Fireworks
As it dies down the boy is simply sitting upon the earth
He brushes off his lush cape
And holds his hands together
Blue flames arc..from hand to hand

...****Ker-Poof****...

In his hands he holds a chilled red chalice 
he sips from it it is good as he knew it would be
He sighs....
Slips the cape off...rolls it into a pillow and places it behind him
Lays back on it relaxes..and stares into the fire...his love.....

By: MJMansfield
12/30/97

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